One of the most painful parts of coercive control is self-doubt. Survivors often say: “I wasn’t sure… but if even a computer can see it, then it must be real.” That moment of recognition matters. Because discomfort isn’t random. If something felt wrong, there’s usually a reason — and there is language for it. Tools like Aimee Says help illuminate patterns survivors were never taught to name: financial abuse, gaslighting, intimidation — all pieces of coercive control. Validation restores clarity.
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When survivors finally enter family court, many arrive believing it’s where justice will finally be seen — but for those escaping narcissistic abuse or coercive control, the reality is often far more devastating. As Dr. Ramani explains in this conversation with Dr. Christine Cocchiola, the “divorce industrial complex” is a multi-billion-dollar system where the most antagonistic, abusive cases generate the most profit. Evaluators, GALs, assessments, court-mandated services — all of it becomes fue
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Domestic violence experts say more middle-aged, older women are fleeing relationships
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Coercive control - IDAS
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There’s a moment survivors never forget — the moment they finally see the abuser for who they truly are. At first, it’s disbelief: “They can’t really be that cruel… can they?” But after separation, the mask falls — and you realize it was all a strategy. Dr. Christine Cocchiola and Vanessa Reiser, LCSW dive into that painful awakening — the shock of post-separation abuse, the mind games of coercive control, and how survivors manage the unbearable reality of co-parenting with someone who thrives o
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